Page 741 - Shakespeare - Vol. 2

Enter Falstaff and Bardolph.

FALSTAFF
Bardolph, am I not fall’n away vilely since this last action? Do I not bate? Do I
not dwindle? Why, my skin hangs about me like an old lady’s loose gown! I
am withered like an old apple-john. Well, I’ll repent, and that suddenly, while
I am in some liking. I shall be out of [5] heart shortly, and then I shall have

no strength to repent. An I have not forgotten what the inside of a church is
made of, I am a peppercorn, a brewer’s horse. The inside of a church!
Company, villainous company, hath been the spoil of me. [10]

BARDOLPH
Sir John, you are so fretful you cannot live long.

FALSTAFF

Why, there is it! Come, sing me a bawdy song; make me merry. I was as
virtuously given as a gentleman need to be, virtuous enough: swore little,
diced not [15] above seven times a week, went to a bawdy house not above
once in a quarter of an hour, paid money that I borrowed three or four times,
lived well, and in good compass; and now I live out of all order, out of all

compass. [20]

BARDOLPH
Why, you are so fat, Sir John, that you must needs be out of all compass −
out of all reasonable compass, Sir John.

FALSTAFF
Do thou amend thy face, and I’ll amend my life. Thou art our admiral, thou

bearest the lantern in the [25] poop − but ’tis in the nose of thee. Thou art
the Knight of the Burning Lamp.

BARDOLPH
Why, Sir John, my face does you no harm.

FALSTAFF
No, I’ll be sworn. I make as good use of it as many a man doth of a death’s-
head or a memento mori. I [30] never see thy face but I think upon hellfire